Halloween Treats

Treat #1: Being an obsessive Googler of my own name (as all good authors should be, right?), I'm not sure how I missed this lovely review of "Empty Vessels" from Morpheus Tales VIII:

"... modern-day horror story set in the bayou and the Gulf of Mexico after a disastrous flood has drowned hundreds of local people. Elroy Jantz, a boatman who occasionally contracted for shrimp companies, is drafted along with many other small boatmen to retrieve the water-logged bodies from the waters. This was one of the gems of this issue and made for a strong finish. The imagery is dark, but unique, and the development of the reader’s understanding of Elroy’s past is revealed carefully, without stunting the pace of the story."

Read the rest of reviewer Maggie Jamison's take at Tangent Online.

Heck, read "Empty Vessels" for free via Scribd.

Treat #2: Tangent keeps coughing them up...a bit about "Precious Metal" (Albedo One #38) from reviewer Dave Truesdale:

"...Aaron Polson's "Precious Metal" gives a snapshot of a post-collapse world where professional gangs ravage the countryside for anything of value, in this case scrap metal of any sort. Using mob tactics, they regularly extort from one old man who lives in a junkyard and who, on the sly, makes the most wonderful creations. His pride and joy is a mechanical owl who can think (think steampunk here). When the mobsters visit the kindly old man in what turns out to be their final visit, the tragedy turns poignant as we learn the mechanical owl has been imbued with feelings as well as thought. Though reminiscent of the devotion flesh and blood animals feel for their owners/masters (especially dogs), this—for want of a better decription—"emotional vignette" achieves its purpose. The final image is well drawn."

More here.

Treat #3: The incomparable Gef Fox allowed me to write about two of my favorite movies (with the same name): Thing One and Thing Two for the Monster Movie Marathon. I like to talk about monsters...

And finally, Treat #4: Joe Nazare has some author blurbs about their favorite Halloween costumes. The blurbs won't be posted until Halloween, but I suspect I'll be busy. Check it out at http://www.macabre-republic.com.

I was Angry, and Then...

This movie meme thing happened. I still have a rant brewing. Maybe tomorrow it will spill over. Maybe not.

1.Name a movie that you have seen more than 10 times:

Rear Window (1954), the original Hitchcock. Talk about suspense, I seen that darn flick a gazillion times, and I still clench up when Raymond Burr (aka Lars Thorwald) enters Jimmy Stewart's place. Yikes.

2.Name a movie that you’ve seen multiple times in the theater:

I'm a cheapskate, so this doesn't happen often. The last time was Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. I wanted to see the "eat shit" look Ginny gave Cho again.

3.Name an actor that would make you more inclined to see a movie:

Harrison Ford. But that was long ago.

4.Name an actor that would make you less likely to see a movie:

Any "professional" wrestler except Tor Johnson. Plan 9 was bitchin'.

5.Name a movie that you can and do quote from:

Okay, I'll name two: Platoon.

I can't help repeating the line from Barnes to O'Neil before the final battle: "We all gotta die sometime, Red."

and Ghostbusters. (any line that comes out of Bill Murray's mouth...Mother Pussbucket comes to mind)

6. Name a movie musical that you know all of the lyrics to all of the songs:

Jesus Christ Superstar. Love it. The movie was weird as hell, too. I also dig Phantom of the Opera (go ahead, throw things), but the movie...meh. I couldn't watch more than ten minutes.

7.Name a movie that you have been known to sing along with:

Guys and Dolls. C'mon everybody..."I got a horse right here..."

8.Name a movie that you would recommend everyone see:

Rebel without a Cause so you'll know what all the James Dean schtuff is about. That and Zombie Strippers. (I'm kidding about one of these, of course)

9. Name a movie that you own:

Seven Samurai. You should probably watch that one, too. Slide it in #8 instead of the strippers.

10.Name an actor that launched his/her entertainment career in another medium but who has surprised you with his/her acting chops:

Ice Cube. Have you seen Anaconda? That's what acting is all about. Hell yeah.

*edit* But seriously...I'm a big Tom Waits fan. Thanks to KC Shaw for reminding me. I loved his Renfield in Bram Stoker's Dracula.

11.Have you ever seen a movie in a drive-in? If so, what?

Regrettably, no, but we did have a "drive-in" party in our backyard last year (big sheet hanging from the house with a projector=drive in). We showed Scooby-Doo episodes for the kids and watched The Horror of Dracula when they went to bed.

12.Name a movie that you keep meaning to see but just haven’t yet gotten around to it:

The last movie with Peter Cushing in it...you know, the one I haven't seen yet. I think it might have vampires in it. Vampires or reanimated corpses. Either that or he plays Sherlock Holmes. Damn. Too many Cushing movies.

13.Ever walked out of a movie:

Only to, you know, go "potty".

14.Name a movie that made you cry in the theater:

Up. Like a freakin' baby. That movie is like torture for the first 10 minutes, man. I also cried at The Muppet Movie, but I was like four or five.

15.What’s the last movie you saw in the theater?

Up. Can't go back to the theater. Too traumatic. Except maybe to see Harry Potter. Gotta have my Potter fix...

16.What’s your favorite/preferred genre of movie?

The good one. You know, with the awesome schtuff in it. Explosions and meaningful exchanges of dialogue about the nature of love and the universe?

17.What’s the first movie you remember seeing in the theater?

The Muppet Movie. It made me question the nature of reality.

18.What movie do you wish you had never seen?

The Ring. Seriously, I had trouble sleeping. Then I started trying to understand the logic of the whole thing, and I had trouble sleeping for a whole different reason.

19.What is the weirdest movie you enjoyed?

Kwaidan. Japanese ghost stories for the win! If you don't think giant eyeballs floating over a blizzard are weird, you're fired.

20.What is the scariest movie you’ve seen?

I'm with Katey on this. Full Metal Jacket freaked me out. Horror stuff, yeah...scary. But war. War is effin' real. Full Metal Jacket is messed up real...weirdo soundtrack that twists your head, too.

21.What is the funniest movie you’ve seen?

I still love Ghostbusters. I didn't get half of it when I was a kid. Some of Aykroyd's lines are priceless. Nobody, but nobody, improvs like Bill Murray. Plus, the big monster at the end? Marshmallow!

Yum.

I'm going to go make some s'mores. Cheers.

Favorite Movie Deaths: The Black Hole

Call me a cheese-monger, but one of my favorite films is The Black Hole. Yeah, it's a Disney movie (shudders). Yeah, some of the robots are goofy looking (V.I.N.C.E.N.T. anyone?). But it also has a kick-ass soundtrack (in my opinion, John Barry's finest work) and Maximilian, the big, red monster-robot.

Yeah. Maximillian is my favorite robot in all of film.

On to the death...

Once Dr. Alex Durant (Anthony Perkins) discovers the truth about Cygnus's crew (um, robo-zombies), and Maximilian turns on him with those spinning blades (think: garbage disposal), well that makes a nice on screen death. No blood needed. Max shreds Dr. Reinhardt's (his creator) notes in the process for a nice, symbolic and forshadowing moment as well. Later in the film, Max leaves Reinhardt for dead.

The Black Hole is dated. The script is stiff. The robots deliver the best acting. But despite these shortfalls, the movie is creepy, very creepy--a nice blend of gothic "haunted house" sensibilities and twisted technology.

And the look on Perkins's face as Dr. Durant's guts are rearranged by Maximilian...priceless.

Other favorite movie deaths?

I'm to Tired to Say Much About Hell House

No, not the Richard Matheson novel, but the 2001 documentary about one of the original evangelical Christian "Scare them to Jesus" haunted houses. I picked this up at the library last week (thank you public library), and wow...was it powerful and deeply disturbing on many levels. The filmmakers do not comment directly, but through a masterful arrangement of shots and sequences. Such subtle comment is how I prefer my documentaries.

Watch it, and prepare to feel uncomfortable.

Thanks for all the well-wishing. Aimee cruised through surgery fine yesterday. According to the doctor, "she only lost about 100ccs of blood". I guess that's a good thing. My favorite hospital sign:

Blood Bank

Please enter to pick up

blood products.

What exactly are "blood products" other than, well blood? I guess there's plasma...maybe soylent red.

Mmmm...soylent red (drools).

Top Ten Giant Creature Movies

...as chosen by me. You don't have to agree, of course, and I'd be glad to entertain dissenting comments.

10. Lord of the Rings: Return of the King 2003

Anyone afraid of giant spiders? Shelob is, in my humble opinion, the most terrifying of the eight-legged freaks on film.

9. 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea

Giant squids are awesomely frightening. I look for them (and sharks) every time I swim in the deep end.

8. The Blob 1958

Don’t watch the remake; the original features Steve McQueen. Steve McQueen. The blob, in some ways, is the ultimate giant monster, growing larger as it ingests more…um…food.

7. Ghostbusters 1984

Weird. Funny. Scary. Best movie of the 80s. “This Mister Stay-Puft is okay. He's a sailor, he's in New York. We get this guy laid, we won't have any trouble…”

6. Jason and the Argonauts 1963

I (heart) Ray Harryhausen. Talos is scary. The Hydra is scary. The skeletons, although normal size, are scary (until they fall off the cliff).

5. Clash of the Titans 1981

Did I mention I (heart) Ray Harryhausen? Obviously the Kraken is one bad monster. Remember the giant scorpions? The best parts of this movie feature all those very special creatures created by Mr. Harryhausen (really the only reasons to watch Clash…).

4. Jaws 1975

Okay, not technically a “giant” shark, but a pretty damn big one. “Farewell and adieu to ye fair Spanish ladies…”

3. Them! 1954

I love schlock and cheese. Them! starts out as 50s noir, then flirts with goofy sci-fi, finally staking its claim to great giant creature feature. The image of the giant ants dropping tiny human remains outside their mound scared the poo out of me as a kid.

2. King Kong 1933/2005

Both incarnations are awesome, for different reasons. The mid-third of Peter Jackson’s take on Kong is pure monster-lover orgasm. The giant bug sequence is truly shiver-inducing.

1. Godzilla (Gojira) 1954

He is the King of the Monsters, and he doesn’t even need that much screen time. Before Godzilla became a joke, he was a scary, scary incarnation of humankind’s atomic fears.

So, what are your favorite big brute movies? What did I miss?

Make Movies?

As if you needed another diversion...I present:

Make your own "movie" at http://www.xtranormal.com/

Dangerous procrastination tool, this. You have to love the interweb.

By the way, he's reciting Shakespeare...Macbeth, Act V, scene 5, lines 19-29.

Eyes Without a Face

I've resurrected my For the Love of Classic Monsters blog with a film recommendation: Eyes Without a Face

This scene is not for the faint of heart.



I've also added a free excerpt from Tainted. Check the link on the sidebar.

Enjoy!

Aliens, yech.

The movie has been out for ages, but just in case you haven't seen the latest Indiana Jones installment, SPOILER ALERT (sort of).

I have such fond memories of Indiana Jones from my childhood (including the nightmares inspired by the heart removal scene in Temple of Doom). The latest movie: aliens, d'oh! That about sums it up.

From the first scene (um, the big hanger was labled 51?) the movie was rife with alien cliche after alien cliche. The damn things even looked like the glow-in-the-dark erasers you can order from Oriental Trading Co. Come on people.

Entertaining? Yeah--car chases, explosions, carnivorous ants, improbable scenes of amphibious cars dashing down waterfalls, etc. But even after all the entertainement, I'm left feeling a little empty and a little cheated.

Grump.

I still love The Black Hole

The Black Hole (1979) as a classic monster film?

On my latest viewing of The Black Hole (a Disney--yes Disney--space adventure released in 1979) I focused on the dark, somewhat gothic atmosphere of the set, oddball design of the robots, and strange performance by Maximilian Schell as the mad Dr. Reinhardt. The film has a wonderful score and effective camera work that adds to the haunting feel. It may be a very uncomfortable space opera with a second rate script and questionable science, but the visuals and themes make this much more. It deserves to be considered a classic cult monster movie.

Ignore the weird, campy moments (e.g., ESP connection with robots--let alone robots voiced by Roddy McDowall and Slim Pickens). Watch for the truly creepy moments--the slow, mounting realization that the Cygnus I's crew was murdered and turned into some kind of zombie/cyborg hybrid by the mad Dr. Reinhardt. The John Barry score is powerful and mysterious, and enhances key moments in the film.The real monster in this film is Maximilian: a multi-armed, red giant of a robot who has a sinister glow from his "eye"--the corners of which turn slightly up to a point like the horns of a Faustian devil.

It is Maximilian that shreds Anthony Perkin's character with his spinning blades, and Maximilian "glances" back at his supposed master Dr. Reinhardt as the mad doctor is crushed by a giant view screen--if the robot had a mouth, you could almost see the slight curl of a smile. Add the surreal man/monster moment in the inferno at the end of the movie, and Maximilian becomes the embodiment of evil. The Black Hole has some flaws--but the "monsters," the look of the Cygnus--sparse and dark, along with the sweeping camera reminiscent of moments from Dracula (Universal 1931) make this movie a curiosity that no monster fan should miss. Even if it is from Disney.

I Am Legend (Ruined...again)

Ok. I Am Legend, a seminal work in the speculative fiction field. A weird tale for the ages, bits and pieces of science fiction, horror, fantasy, and just plain oddness wrapped tightly in a nice little ironic package by the master Richard Matheson.

Then Hollywood digs its gnarly hands into the story and destroys it. I had high hopes--Will Smith aside--that this incarnation of the classic novella would come close to the original, that feeling of "ohhhhh..." that hit when reading the last page.

Nope. Hollywood intervenes with another martyr/cowboy ending, and Robert Neville goes out in a blaze of glory. No irony. No thought. No "ah-ha" moment for the hungry Matheson fan.

I'm tired of Hollywood selling us the same "good guys win in the end" story and pretending it's something new.

Oh...by the way...spoiler alert. I guess that should have gone first--just like somebody should have warned me about the movie...