Friday, February 26, 2010

#fridayflash Bad Poetry

A young officer drops a plastic evidence bag on Detective Talbot’s desk. The detective flinches and scoots back.

“Jeezus, Pendergast. What’s that?”

“Vegetable peeler.”

Talbot nods. “I can see that, but the dark stuff—is that blood?”

“Yes.”

“Found this at the Gardner house, didn’t they?”

“Yes. Looks like this sicko used it to scrape the skin off her body.”

“Her name was Rose, wasn’t it?” Talbot pulls at his lip. “Roses are red…” He jumps up from the desk. “Get a phonebook.”

“What?”

“I need to know the location of all the women named Violet in town. Find out which one’s have freezers big enough for to hold a body. I think I know where he's going next...”

14 comments:

Jamie Eyberg said...

nice. I just got a new peeler the other day. I wonder how sharp it actually is?

Barry Napier said...

Quick and to the point. And, most importantly, awesome.

Alan W. Davidson said...

He, he, he...good one. "I think I know where he's going next..." indeed. Hmm, a skinning at the Gardner household...

Aaron Polson said...

Jamie - Those things are surprisingly sharp.

Barry - Thanks.

Alan - Yeah, Rose Gardner--a little cheeky, isn't it?

Jeremy D Brooks said...

Cute...

Funny, I just edited a chapter in my WIP earlier this week where a character carries a peeler like a shank, and another character comments that he could peel someone's skin off with it.

Cate Gardner said...

Excellent take... And the title half reminds me (removing the bad part - unless in this case we mean rotting) I need to read that zombie poetry book.

Donald Conrad said...

Yeah those things are sharp. This one's quick and concise. Thanks.

Dana said...

Having scraped my knuckles once or twice with a potato peeler, all I can say is, Ouch poor girl.

David G Shrock said...

Sharp and funny.

CJ Hodges MacFarlane said...

Ack - how horrible! Nicely done because I've got the heebie-jeebies now.

brookelyn said...

Paging Violet Pruner, please report to the police department immediately... and you may want to bring your pizza cutter with just in case. hehe. very entertaining! i'm a little disturbed by what one might do with skin peelings *shudder*.

katey said...

Golly, what's he gonna do for the "sugar" bit?

That was awesome, Aaron :D

Cathy Olliffe said...

What a great idea for a novel! Go Aaron!
Oh, and vegetable peelers aren't the only sharp things in the kitchen. Last week I carved my thumb on the cheese grater. (little extra protein for the salad)

Tom Gillespie said...

... better set to it before he gets to sugar and then YOU!
Great riff..